Solstice Letter for December 2015
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Dear Family and Friends:
This past year has been one of the most complex of my life, in that it has been a year of pain, achievements, challenges, fun, questioning, doubting, creativity, teaching , learning and accepting.
In November 2014, I had two bouts of gout, a continuing allergic reaction to leaf mold, and a bladder infection. I was sometimes not able to teach. December was great, and no illness. Then January swept in with great speed, and by January 12, I was diagnosed with shingles. Peter was wonderful. He had to do most of the shopping, picking up medications and taking me to the doctor. I was able to teach most of the time, but could not move around much without exciting the agonizing pain. I was able to compose sometimes, practice vocal repertoire a little, and read many good books. The rash and small blisters lasted three months, but the smouldering itch went from agony to irritation. Some days, I feel the irritation more than others. Eventually, I think, it will vanish completely. I was able to return to aqua fitness the second week of April. I very much appreciate all the support from friends and family during this year. There were some lovely experiences in my life this past year. One of the couples I married in 2003 had a baby. I was able, thanks to Peter, to be able to attend the lovely shower in March. The atmosphere was warm and joyful. It was a big event for me, because I had not been to a baby shower for many years. During my fifteen years as a Humanist Officiant, I named several babies, but I did not have any friends or family who had a baby shower.
On April 26, the Harmelodic Club presented a concert at St. Luke's Anglican Church, on Somerset St. West, Ottawa. We had a full house, and made a good purse. What was most meaningful for me, as a producer and musician, was that I had so much great support and help from my fellow members. They are really good musicians and really great people! My Winter Lullaby, which was premiered, was very well received. It was performed by one of our sopranos, while I accompanied her. Many colleagues in the audience who are singers, want a copy of it to perform.
It was a quiet summer for us. We did not travel far, but we had a voluptuous garden this year. Every plant and tree burst out in great blooms, lasting many weeks. Even our oak, apple, ornamental crab, rowan and maple trees' leaves stayed green for long weeks into the end of October, and finally fell.
In August I had another bout of gout. Since having gout and shingles, I've had to learn to calibrate my activities and plans differently. I do not have the vocal range nor the high amount of energy I used to have. Although many of you might have been slightly overwhelmed at my enthusiasm, (and some of you have told me that), I've noticed that I cannot push myself in so many directions at once. It is emotionally challenging for me to accept this new state. Intellectually, I can understand that at my age, of course, I cannot expect to do as much as fast as I used to do ten years ago. Emotionally, I sometimes feel very frustrated with my limitations. In no way do I want to 'fade out'. I want to be a driving force behind many projects; however, it seems that there are days when my energy level is lower, and my spirit is also low. I am very grateful for friends who still believe in me, (as I in you), who accept my slower pace, and lesser activity. Peter and I really enjoy having friends and family for dinners, teas, and dining out events. I've been able to photograph most of them, so that I can remember each and all of you, as the years fly. I still write in my diaries. I now have almost a trunk full. Each experience means much to me. Even if it was not a happy one, it has meaning. Perhaps I'm a compulsive writer, but I know that having been born when I was, and having lived in this time, that this era is indeed, a fulcrum or anvil, which has made it the force and probable process of design for the next fifty years.
Hopefully, our children's offspring will appreciate what actions we took, what ideas we communicated, what values we had, and make thoughtful decisions based on our experience and wisdom, as well as our mistakes. By reading diaries of those of us who were diarists, they might glean some insight into our purposes for our lives. I wish each and all of you a meaningful Solstice and a great year ahead.
With all my love and affection,
Diane.
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